Musings about my world as I see it

Archive for the category “Love and friendship”

Feeling the passion

Passion.  What exactly is it? Are we really hollow without it? Once we feel it, are we its slave?

Most of us today think of passion in terms of love and sex, or an ardent enthusiasm for something else. An ambition to win an Olympic gold medal perhaps, or to be the yellow jersey winner of Le Tour de France could be your passion. It could be as simple as loving a TV show, or a football team, or breeding dogs. In earlier times it had other meanings: suffering, misery, a martyr’s death.

One thing is certain. Passion is intense and all-consuming. Angelus from Buffy the Vampire Slayer exhibited passion that saw some die, and others driven to madness. Angelus, the soulless version of the vampire Angel, was passion personified.

In the Middle Ages it was regarded as a type of mania, a madness. Something a lunatic would experience, especially during a full moon.

moon - view39190

These days we think of it in terms of sex, or any other intense emotion such as hate, envy, jealousy. Passion is a stratospheric thing. You can’t like with a passion, but you can hate with a passion.

We want passion in our relationships. A few hundred years ago no one would have made that complaint. Perhaps they were right. We may only be physically and mentally able to tolerate a certain level of passion before we lose ourselves.


The French have a legal term for crimes that are caused by passion: crime passionnel. Anyone committing murder when influenced by passion in France has a legitimate legal excuse for those actions.

So if you were to ask me if I want passion in my life, I would say that I do. And also that I don’t. I want its exhilaration and euphoria, but I don’t want the shadow side of passion. The hate and envy that will poison every relationship if they’re allowed to. No. I wouldn’t want that.

But I don’t want a ‘hollow’ life. So yes, give me passion. Let my blood rush and my heart race. Let me scream with frustration, or love, or rage if I must. As long as I mainly get the highs I will tolerate the lows.

Signing off, passionately.

Signing off, passionately.

Curing a sick love corner

Have you ever tried to do something and found that things just get worse and worse instead of better, kind of like they did in the movie Bridesmaids? (Think of the scene in the posh dress shop after the dodgy lunch before it.)

Sick bridesmaids

Such was the case for me when I decided to take the plunge and Feng Shui my love life, to reinvigorate it. What was there to lose? I put in a bit of study and it all seemed easy enough.  Feng Shui experts speak about love corners and, as there are only so many corners in my home, I figured this should be a quick job.

So, compass in hand and several internet sources later, I was ready. One site had a few good tips. Another site seemed a little more hard-core, but in the spirit of plunging in, I read it and a few others.

They all agreed that you need to sort out your love corner.  Apparently it’s:

“the area of your home against the back wall on the far right (when you’re standing at the entrance and looking in.) You can apply the Feng Shui ba gua to an individual room, such as your living room or master bedroom, to your whole house, or even to your property.”

Okay, ba gua aside, that seemed straightforward.

These are some of the things to do in order to nurture a love corner:

  • Hang pictures of men in your home. (I am SO on board with this idea.)
  • Try not to have a toilet, kitchen, or storeroom in that zone (phew, but only by luck)
  • Keep computers and books out of love corners as they encourage study and work, not romance
  • Flowers or candles can infuse the space and, hopefully, the love life
  • Declutter the corner

My love corner is in my bathroom.  In fact, it’s where the shower is, right beside a window.
As I entered the bathroom with my Feng Shui radar on, I recoiled with horror to see what was on the window sill.

What Johnny Depp left behind when he fled my apartment.

No, not Johnny Depp, but a packet of razor blades.

Razor. Blades. In. The. Love. Corner.

How is a girl supposed to recover from that?  What could I do to cure it?

What I found out is that I have to put something in that corner that is of my element: earth.

Cure me, sweet Bonsai.

A Bonsai tree has earth in the pot. Perfect. The plant was acquired and put on the window sill.

Relieved, I told a friend of my near miss.  She listened, full of sympathy, until I told her about the Bonsai.
Her face contorted until she exploded into laughter and it was several minutes until she could speak.

“What if you get a guy with a small…” I didn’t let her finish but was out the door and down the street. I had to get rid of that Bonsai immediately.

I discovered that it was the wrong cure anyway as a plant is more the wood element than the earth element.

Oh no, how could I?

These days I have some pretty crystals in that corner. Two of them, as things should be in pairs to attract love.

I just hope my love life recovers from the threat of razor blades and shrunken parts now that the crystals are placed and working for me.

I’ll keep you posted.

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